J jostles JAYWALKERS


Just to set the record straight, a Jaywalker is nowhere related to Johnnie Walker. In fact, it is a term attributed to those who love to walk, into oncoming traffic and sorts. We were taught as kids, that you cross a street when you see the green walk sign only.  I actually experienced this only on my first trip to Dubai in 2001. The discipline when it came to motorists respecting pedestrians was intimidating. The pedestrians in return avoided cutting through intersections, even if there wasn’t a vehicle in sight. Big Brother was watching on the cameras. And, the fines were quite a hole in the pocket. I was told, universally, this was the norm. Jaywalking was a serious offence. 

Cut to, back home. Cows in the middle of the street, bikes on pavements and vehicles too close to comfort. Everyone, jostling for an inch of space, to move in whichever direction an opening shows up. Welcome to India where jaywalking is an art. As Shakespeare once said, “The whole world is a garden and we all are bees”. So also, out here, you buzz and you learn. 

Crossing the street takes courage. First, you check all the traffic that has added to the chaos on  the street. You select a vehicle that is way off the radar. You know he will notice you. Next, make eye contact and show him your hand signalling him to slow down. Well, he has the brakes, you don’t. And if he does, great. You breeze past. If not, you hastily cross, muttering the choicest expletives under your breath. Congratulations, you are a level one Jaywalker. Level two is a tad bit tricky. Try doing the same, whilst on the phone. Chatting is passe, texting is thrilling. Of course, you have the usual hurdles of bridges, subways, zebra crossings et al. Do away with them. What is the point if you ain’t living on the edge? 

The disciplinary force have tried to channelize their energies towards creating better citizens. They fined a couple of this gay tribe to inculcate caution. As a result, the college students handed them their books, which they rarely used. The ladies left them with their shopping baskets of groceries.  While the men simply gave them ‘You think I do this by choice?’ look. Since they could not manage to break even with the bribes, this sector has been languishing in doldrums. On condition of anonymity, a veteran disciplinarian said, “People are way too adventurous out here. Nothing deters them. A stray case of hit and run, they are back to business the next day. Their never-say-die spirit is commendable.” So, bottom line, if you survive the streets out here, you can conquer the altitudes of Everest. Keep on walking! 




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54 responses to “J jostles JAYWALKERS”

  1. Suzy avatar
    Suzy

    I think in India if you’re not a level 1 Jaywalker you’re pretty much stuck on the sidelines. A fun post, enjoyed it.

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Oh yes, true that. Survival of the fittest, out here.

  2. Meena avatar
    Meena

    Jaywalking is the biggest menance. But then whos to be balmed? Many times there are no proper pedestrain crossing either!

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      True. and we don’t have them coz we don’t use them. Vicious circle, this.

  3. Shilpa Garg avatar

    Seen those who cross the road anytime (especially on highways and expressways) and make you brake suddenly and in the process you invite the wrath of traffic behind and sometimes even the jaywalker! Yes, we are like that, only!

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      And they do that with such gay abandon that you want to scream blue murder!

  4. JANU avatar

    What’s life without these everyday adventure? Have been a part of jaywalking at one or the other point of time…it goes with the Indian tag. Will behave when abroad…I promise. 😀

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Ah, you speak what is true for each person who travels on foreign shores and learns to behave.

  5. Corinne Rodrigues avatar
    Corinne Rodrigues

    Jay walking in India is certainly not for the birds! 😉

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Absolutely not, Corinne. They have their wings right?

  6. hitchwriter avatar

    Suzy’s comment sums it up… just a few days back I had to cross the road to get a cigarette as wifey was busy shopping.. and I got the creeps… !! even in my small town the traffic has gone up so so high… it was impossible to cross at 8 in the evening ! phew… jaywalking in India is an art I tell ya ! 😛

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Where do all these people come from? It is amazing, they are everywhere!

  7. Rainbow Hues avatar

    Nice post. As Suzy says, if you’re not a Jaywalker, you may as well stay stuck on the sidelines. Its not just about traffic, mind you, everywhere else too.

    myriadrainbow.blogspot.in

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Well, no one likes to be sidelined I guess….

  8. Dee avatar

    Hilarious post! The art of jaywalking is also practised in my home country, the Philippines. Here in Singapore they’re strict.

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      And yes, I saw that in Singapore. Loved the city for its discipline.

  9. Roshni AaMom avatar

    heheh!! To tell you the truth, I also do that in our neighborhood, though only on the side roads! 😛 Will never learn!

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      We are made of sterner stuff, you see 😛

  10. Ruchira avatar

    Jaywalkers deserve awards for crossing the roads the way they do and car drivers like me need a even bigger award for managing to not hit one in so many years ! Delhi has over bridges now but I have seen people run across the street when all they had to do was a climb a few stairs !!

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Extra work or workouts have never been in our dictionary. Drive that car at 20 km/hr.

  11. Afshan avatar

    Good post to show how traffic sense is minus here .if you don’t master jay walking you can’t rule the roads here !
    Loved the funny narration and levels

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      thank you Afshan. Funny, but dangerous too.

  12. Laxmi Chundi Addanki avatar

    Your posts are such fun – smiling as we speak :-)Cheers, L

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Thanks Laxmi 🙂

  13. Cynthia Rodrigues Manchekar avatar

    Your posts always, AlWAYS, make me laugh out loud. And I realised, I am a Level 1 jaywalker. I do the hand signal, but a little guiltily. I don’t chat on the phone or text while walking or crossing. The first time I went abroad, it was Singapore, I was walking with a friend. She always tells me, one moment we were all walking and the next moment, I was running through the maze, trying to cross the street. Thank God, the cameras didn’t get me. Headless chicken, my friend still calls me.

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      We all are just the same. What to do!

  14. Anonymous avatar
    Anonymous

    As a die hard pedestrian ,I take up cudgels for our lot ….I too turn Jaywalker so often ,not for the thrill ,but out of sheer necessity! or else I would have to walk at least a km to cross the street .Its funny to watch us Indians out here at A zebra crossing or at a green light that blinks for us pedestrians to cross ..Every one of us will check and recheck and chec a few times more before we cross ..it just does not sink in that folks WILL STOP .Thanks for an interesting piece.Jacinta

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Oh yes. It is amazing, our indecisiveness, to go or not to go. The car stops though, abroad. In India, the car will tag you along on the windscreen 😀

  15. Chatty Wren avatar

    Lol, fun post to read! love your sense of humour.

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Thanks Chatty 😀

  16. Shail Mohan avatar

    You summed it up in your last sentences. If you survive on these roads you will anywhere else 🙂

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Oh yeah! That is so darn true.

  17. Preetilata【ツ】 avatar

    i am so used to it. I would be taken aback if some day i don’t encounter a jaywalker. 😛

    And your sense of humor is t die for.

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Adjusting the halo on the head Preeti 😀

  18. 1hundredworks avatar
    1hundredworks

    Haha! I ride a bike to office, in Navi Mumbai. I face jaywalkers everyday! Whenever they show up invited, I do fret a lot, I feel they are occupying my space. Curiously enough, when I am walking, I find other riders and drivers getting into my face 🙂 We need a new term, jaydriving or something.

    Akhil Kalsh.

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Ah, the walker becomes the walkee at times, eh? Must explore this angle too…someday.

  19. Subroto avatar

    “Baat j hai ki….”
    I found myself nodding in agreement when I read this post. A mere decade and a half of living outside the mother country and I have lost the fine art of crossing the road when back home. Each time when I am in Delhi, I find myself visualising a byline in next day’s newspaper “NRI run over when crossing the road”. And don’t get me started on the Zebra crossings we have in our national capital. One day some naïve foreigner will think they function the way that they do back home and be promptly run over. Actually why that has happened yet eludes me but probably due to the fact that Marutis dent easily and getting a foreign body scraped off the fender is an expensive proposition.

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Ah, I can see I touched a sore point. Well, till the time of such headlines, let’s just hope those Zebra crossings don’t go extinct. Not that they aren’t already….

  20. Nandana avatar

    Hehe hilarious one. But to see it happen everyday gets on my nerves. Jaywalking is like the nation’s passtime.

    There’s another level…look at the oncoming traffic, and then look away and march straight ahead without once caring to see how dangerously close to the vehicles you are. The queen is crossing, why should everyone else drive. Women tend do this a lot.

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      ah, I wouldn’t be gender biased here. I think in fact men and women are an equal to say, at least out here.

  21. Grammy Staffy avatar

    You have taught me a whole new art form! I’m Grammy from A to Z land

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Happy to help Grammy. Such a prized name, BTW

  22. prateek mathur avatar

    I never thought that the “never say die spirit” phrase could be used wrt Jaywalking! Nice… 😀

    As the comment above, the phrase Jaywalking is first introduced to our conscious only when we go abroad. Its funny to think now, but it was kinda weird when we first got here. We wouldn’t try crossing the road, having being brought up with the motto, “badi gadi pehle jayegi”! And the poor US driver won’t go either as he has no idea that the guy in front of his car is a traffic hardened Indian. There would be a few half steps coinciding with a few half attempts to speed up by the driver; And the constant eye contact! Oh, the constant eye contact…stuff directly from KJos movies I tell u! 😀 😀

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      a whole lotta things that include discipline are introduced to us when we are not in our ‘baap country’.

      And oh about your incidents…..I hear you!

  23. sridevi datta avatar

    Truths of life told with the trademark of Blogwatig …*nodding my head sagely & trying hard not to laugh*

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      I promise to speak the truth and nothing but the truth……..

  24. Rickie avatar

    Hahhah…funny! One addition to the tribe of Jaywalkers is the kind that wears headphones. Clearly, their motto is – Since I can’t hear them, I can do whatever I please!

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Allah ke nej bande hain. Na bura dekhte hain, na sunte hain………khair….jane do.

  25. Rahul Aggarwal avatar

    i remember when i was in johannesburg, a local colleague asked why in india cows are sitting in the middle of the road .. i replied, well cows are considered sacred in india so we really don’t hesitate when cows sit in the middle of the road .. considering the godly status we give them ..

  26. Rahul Aggarwal avatar

    i forgot to add, the colleague gave a look i myself could never comprehend .. and i thought what i said was funny 😛

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Ah….and you still friends, the two of you? 😛

  27. Richa avatar

    To not be a jaywalker in India is a crime. Given the fact that vehicles typically speed up when they see someone crossing or that red signals are meant to be broken, it’s silly to not cross exactly when the signal turns green. Also, those lovely skywalks are for birds to perch on and drug peddlers to sleep on right?

    1. Blogwati Gee avatar

      Of course, we have a strong notion of follow the leader. The headless chicken syndrome has a wide mass appeal.

  28. […] Been there, done that.  Broadcast to the world. […]

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