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| Image courtesy http://www.freeimages.co.uk |
Even as I write this, I have unknown relatives waiting to stash their millions into my bank account. Apparently, they can’t trust their government and their life is in grave danger. Apart from making me feel like a part of a James Bond movie, they continue without a clue of my first name. Such emails always begin with ‘Dear Friend’ and end in ‘send me your bank details’. The five emails currently in my E-mail box make me wonder, perhaps, dad has not been completely honest with us. Or maybe it really is mom? She always harped on the importance of ethnicity. Considering this new found development, am I even Indian?
My thoughts are interrupted by a notification on my screen. A picture of a malnourished alien somewhere in Timbuktu tugs at my heart. It makes me feel guilty for being able to sit in the comfort of my home office and see him. “Like the picture if you have a heart. Share if you are have an ass.” My eyes get clouded for a moment. One like is all it will take to put food on his table. I bless the generous soul who shows me what’s happening at the other end of the solar system. We tend to get so wrapped in our own lives that we forget to be grateful.
I’ve hardly recovered from the pictorial attack when someone shares a video of how Hitler has shown a keen interest in making Harry Potter his masterchef. The video has just about gone viral and already has 2,00,000 hits. I laugh at their foolishness. Everyone knows T. Cruise has already appointed him as Suri’s personal gym trainer. “It’s too late for Hitler”, I comment, making my displeasure known.
In other news, the First Lady’s memoirs now to be an action packed motion picture titled If I’d married him. ATM robberies no longer a lucrative business, as entering the reverse PIN alerts the neighbour’s dog. Talking about dogs, the world’s largest dog has adopted a horse , while Disney’s Little Mermaid was seen sunbathing in Malaysia. A gentle reminder, it also is the GUFFAWS (Great Universal Fools Felicitation & AWarenesS) Month, please turn off the lights in your profile picture to extend your support.
I diligently click forward and send this to the 1000 odd friends on my list. After all sharing is caring. ‘Happy are those who haven’t seen and yet believe’, said the Lord. I see and I believe. Am I supposed to question the authenticity? In that case, I wonder why is the internet called the world wide web? Maybe, Spiderman has a stake in the global shares. Go figure!
‘Share’ if you love the girl next door. ‘Like’ if you fancy her mother.
This is a Blog Hop
Comments
I’m ‘liking’ and ‘sharing’ for fear of the Goddess BlogwatiG introducing me to and landing me with some of her notorious fans in the near future! 😉
Corinne, the heavens are pleased and some good will befall you in the next 24 hours. Don’t break this chain!
Fabulous – share with 5 10 15 friends in the next 5 mins or else beware! The delete button is ever so handy.
You got that right Suzy 😛
How about comment? What does commenting do?
Haha this made me laugh. Great post! 🙂
Commenting gets me to visit your Blog Dee, which I did and loved. Thanks for connecting.
Hilarious! I seriously wonder about the “send me your bank details”… I mean what were they thinking when creating these mails!!
And I hate those things on FB… Pictures of Gods and a flashing message, Like in 1 minute if you are a true Bhakt! or 1 million Likes for this Cancer patient!!
Tell me about it Shilpa. According to all the fwds I did not send, I’m not on the safe list of any deity.
LOL…I would have been raking in billions by now.
And then I would have been your best friend 😀
Nice one done here…quite some wit 🙂
Thanks for the post
Glad you thought so 🙂
I know… some Nigerians have been following me assiduously for a few days now. And hey,you FORGOT how ‘Shirdi Baba’ will bless you if you ‘forward’ a pic of his or alternatively curse you! And like the pic of Mother Teresa 🙂
Fantastic post. Super fun!
Cuckoo, I did put in a subtle mention towards the fag end. Don’t want Saffron ire on my creative liberties 😛
Super funny post, Blogwati Gee! However,this kind of forwarding, has another side to it. When desperate teenagers click on “such” links, and they get forwarded to their entire lists, there is a always a following post stating how their account was hacked and they didn’t spam! 😀
You are telling me Prateek! It is like the Forward button is a part of their damn motherboard.
Great post! 🙂
Thanks 🙂
hehe there r no interesting creatures my next door !
loved wat all u told. I love forwarding but only some thng which really excited/ impacted not som chain mail which says Forward for luck or for donation
Yest I read abt”The Boulder Pledge.” in a frnds blog
It so makes sense
As long as you verify before you click, it’s all good Afshan.
LOL, Blogwati!! You nailed it on this time!! And, right now, I’m waiting for my Nigerian prince to rescue me, as he promised to in an email!! 😛
Nigerian prince, Russian Princess and Indian setting………hmmm sounds like an M&B on the way, Roshni.
Hhhe for one moment you had me F for fooled with that title 🙂 I thought it would be something about “Moving forward” in life 🙂 but I am really going to forward this to the next 100 people on my list 🙂
And you will be blessed abundantly. Look for a sign in the next 48 hours. Your cellphone will ring.
Frankly, by the texts that I got, that I won 1,000,000 GBP, USD..blah blah, I should have been featured on the Forbes World’s Richest List long back.
Need of the hour, this post. Good one Vinita.
Ah, and we’d be best friends. Glad you liked the post.
Like like and like and identified with it too .Jacinta
Lol, thanks A.Jacinta
Thanks for the laugh! What a great blog and so true!
Glad you liked what you read 😀
You had me laughing throughout this hilarious post. By the way, today someone sent me a photo which shows Bill Gates holding a placard that says, send this mail to 10 others and for every send I will donate $100 to some African country, I forget which.
Great, now you also will join the ranks of the rich and the spammed!
Excellent!! You perfectly captured the absurdity of it all and had me laughing out loud.
Thanks DL. It is a circus out there.
wow- what a fabulous post vinita; tickled my funny bones to the extreme.F is for fun unlimited 🙂
Thanks Priya. Had this dancing in my head for days 😀
LOL. Seriously, great post. 🙂
Lola @ Sex Babble
I almost ticked you as spam, lol. Thanks for reading.
An awesome one Blogwati G
Thanks Vishal.
ROFL post, loved it! I’m also targeted by these weight-loss spammers, don’t know how they know about me? Actually forwarding this post is a great idea 🙂
You must Chatty or you will have a blue sky every morning to wake up to.
Spammers and cheaters online. And still the worst you see many of your friends a part of this fool game. Very well written n the sarcasm was simply awesome.
http://neoimaginations.blogspot.in/
The problem is we don’t read and analyse, we just click like and share!
The forwards!Forward this message to 10 people you love. You will get a good news you have wanting to hear in next 10 minutes. Do not ignore this message. Do forward. I just did.
Hahaha!!! Awesome!
See, told you….it works 🙂
😀 I get a lot of those, too. The first time, years ago, I was like…what?!? They are mostly from Nigeria/Kenya type places and sometimes the UK.
Hilarious post. My neighbors are all elderly.
Vidya, relocate to a new neighbourhood 😛
Haha, can’t stop laughing. I wrote once about this penchant on the part of total strangers on the internet to want yo fill my coffers with money. And as for the likes and shares that is supposed to do just about everything for you, the less said the better.
I must read that Shail. Will ask you for the link.
LOL. Seriously! If forwards and likes ran the world, we would all be millionaires and cancer would have long been eradicated and there would be no world poverty or hunger! Jeez, the forwards that come in! 🙂
Hai na Deepa! And yet they thrive….and how!
Hilarious but sadly true. Out of a ten thousand there are one or two who really fall for that “send me your bank details”
True that. But the forwards are dime by a dozen. Thanks for dropping by.
Damn, my bad Tanmay! Let me go look for some more killer pics.
I tell you! What Bill Gates is trying to do with his Foundation, I am trying to do by hitting the Like and Share buttons! 😀
Hysterically funny!
And you will be blessed with a sign at 11.59 am The clock will strike 12!
Dear Blogwati, there will surely be some disappointed Nigerian princes and still starving Mali kids coz of this post!
At least send more details of the sunbathing mermaid. Maybe she needs some sunblock?
Hi Blogwati Gee,
Good to hear from you again,
This is really and interesting post, and ha, i am also a blessed person with millions of relative in abroad, who wants my bank details. LOL. Still the sad part is that many are falling prey to
such relative. So sad.Thanks again for dropping by. at Tins’s page
Getting to Know Tina’s Terrific Team!Phil.
Good Wishes
Keep in touch
Phil @ Philipscom
An ambassador to A to Z Challenge @ Tina’s Life is Good
And My Bio-blog
Thanks so much. If you get rich, lemme know 😀
Hey! For what it’s worth, I featured this post on my blog today: http://www.bigaandlittlea.com/2013/04/best-posts-from-the-April-Challenge.html
Awwwww, thank you so much 🙂
LOL Wonderful! I love how you’ve weaved all those lovely spam emails into a captivating story! Nicely done and thank you so much for linking up with the Humor Me! Blog Hop!
Thanks so Terrye. Oh yes, those spam mails are something else. Thank you for dropping by. I am loving this challenge. It is so me.
Aw, now I feel bad for sending those emails to spam. I could have been rich! Thank you for hooking up with us at the Humor Me Blog Hop!
Ah, Sarah, if you only knew!
Reading it again and laughing out loud all over.
And I am pleased as a punch!
What about those “Sneeze heavily if you have a heartache” and “Eat this if you have cancer” kind of mails. They always make my ticker palpitate and send me hunting for non existent tumours in my body. The best friend type makes me laugh, I don’t have money to bank, so than ye kindly
Oh, I guess I missed them. Maybe will do a round two on these!
You seriously made me look into my inbox… 8442 unread mails and I am a millionaire after being the luckiest person for so many people, have received the blessings of all Gods and babas. Not to mention the text messages and recent calls about winning the mega prize at Inorbit sale.
And if you are rich, I am your best friend!